Slowing Down

I close the front door and reach for the keys. I am balancing a baby on one hip, and carrying about three bags and a water bottle with the other arm. I am running late. There’s a lot to think about, and a lot to get done. I’ve got places to be.

I head down the stairs as quick as I can safely. I’m already thinking ten minutes in the future when, wham! I get to the bottom stair and the sun hits me in the eyes. I take a big breath and feel the cool, crisp, fall air enter my body. I feel the sun’s bit of warmth on my forehead. I stop, turn to my son, and smile. He gazes back at me and his face lights up.

When was the last time I even looked at his face? Not while we went down the stairs, not while I locked up. Not as I put on his jacket, or changed his diaper. I was too rushed, too “busy”, too worried about things that don’t matter.

I look back at my son and soak in the beauty of the moment. “I love you, bud.” I tell him. Then I plant about five of the juiciest kisses I can on his plump cheeks. “Isn’t it beautiful out here? A little cold…yes…but beautiful.” He looks at me again and says, “ba.”

I am finally living in the present. From the moment that I looked into my son’s eyes I had no choice. I slowed down and realized what mattered. I stood there in the sun interacting with my boy, still holding myriad bags and still running late, but not caring at all. This is how I want to live me life. Here. Now. People say to enjoy every moment…but does anyone actually do that? Well I did this morning. And I’m going to try to live that way more.