I feel like I’ve been in a cloud of negativity recently. I don’t know why. There’s nothing really wrong. But I’ve felt a bit down nonetheless. There are a few things that can make it evaporate instantly. Like Elias smiling and saying “Mama” while he holds his arms out to me or shows me a new discovery. Or like a long hug from Nathan where I can feel the tension melting off my body. But even with those moments sprinkled in, the fog of negativity rolls back in. I often don’t like blogging during these periods of negativity because I don’t want this to turn into a place where I whine and gripe about things that won’t even bother me in a few days. But I wanted to force myself to write because I felt like it would help me get out of my funk. So I decided…what better way than to look through my journal of thanks and share a few of the things that have brought me joy. I haven’t shared for awhile so I’ll just choose some of them:
322. Olive stretched out on the carpet, soaking in the sun as if every drop mattered
323. Marveling over bird calls and bright red plumage with Elias
329. Elias patting my back during a hug
334. A working washer and dryer
351. Bare toddler feet
354. Rereading a good book
366. Wind whipping at the flags across the street
370. Excited voices of children running down the hall
375. Getting my first issue of Sojourners magazine
378. Elias putting himself to sleep
381. Grandpa and Elias touching noses
389. Rain blurring on the window
390. Finding a child sponsor
395. G.H. encouraging me in my Child Ambassadorship
397. Olive going crazy chasing a bread tie
398. Long hugs with Nathan
401. Receiving a handwritten letter in the mail
411. The moment when Elias first sees Nathan as he walks home and says, “Daddy”
There are so many more….