Portland Water Walk

Posted on March 23, 2012 by kimberly

Having clean, safe water be available to everyone in the world has been a concern/passion of mine for a while now. It just bewilders me why we (as in humanity in general) can’t get it together enough to help those in the most desperate circumstances. One dollar can pay for clean water for one person for a whole year. It is relatively so cheap compared to all the spending we do for other purposes during the year.

Although I’ve been passionate about it for awhile, I’ve never been to Africa. Camping is probably the closest I’ve come to being able to relate to not having enough water. I don’t know what it is like to have to walk hours a day just to have a few gallons of water. I don’t know what it is like to have my water full of disease or dirt.

I am very excited to be participating in the Portland Walk For Water tomorrow! It’s not too late to participate if you are interested. Show up at OMSI tomorrow between 8:30 and 10:00 a.m. to register! The walk starts at 10:00 a.m. and will simulate what it is like for millions of people every day. Find out more about it here.

I am excited and happy to participate, but I must keep in mind that it is just a simulation. Tomorrow will probably be sunny and mild temperatures. My life won’t depend on getting the water back home safely. I’ll have had a good night sleep (hopefully!) and I’ll go home afterward to my faucet and clean water. I can’t imagine what it would be like to be in the shoes of these beautiful people, but hopefully tomorrow I will help raise awareness, and I will gain some small insight into their situation.

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I Feel Like A Kid Again

Posted on March 21, 2012 by kimberly

The snow is falling. Yes, we’re only a few minutes away from March 22nd. I have to admit that my first thoughts once I realized that the snow was sticking were about how it would mess up my plan for the day tomorrow. We’ve got places to be. Errands to run. How dare mother nature interfere with us humans?

But I’m glad it’s snowing. In fact I’m a bit giddy about it. I keep running up to the window and peeking out like I did when I was a kid. “Is it still snowing?” I ask my husband. I mentally tally up the inches on the grass. I witness the growing heaviness of snow on tree branches outside our window. I see cars drive by with tons of snow on them, and I wonder where they’ve been.

I look to the lamplight and I see the snow lazily drifting down toward the earth. I see the beauty of the world covered in white. I feel the peacefulness that comes with a snowfall. The frogs are even silent in the wetlands tonight. Their usual cacophony contrasts with tonight’s silence to make it even more majestic. Even the frogs are changed by the snow.

I choose to enjoy this snowfall, as I am trying to choose to enjoy every moment these days. Earlier this evening as we took Elias out into the snow to walk around, my husband said, “We’re not old fuddy-duddies anymore are we? You’re living life to it’s fullest.”

“I’m trying,” I replied as I looked up into the swirling flakes. I truly am trying. You know what happens when you try to see the joy in things? (Even the annoying plan messing up kind of things?) You feel joyful. Here’s to staying up way too late to get a few moments of extra joy this night. The snow may be all gone by the time we wake up…so we’ve got to find joy in it now!

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Art Lessons From the Creator

Posted on March 20, 2012 by kimberly

I’ve been noticing more and more recently how much my son wants to emulate my husband and me. He is 17 months now, and is becoming more physically capable of actually doing things on his own. He can wash his own hands (with the help of a step stool, of course). He feeds the cats every morning. He carries in a loaf of bread or something else equally undamagable when I carry in the groceries from the car. He has watched me floss every day for about 7 months (before that I have to admit I didn’t floss much except right before the dentist appointment…). About two weeks ago he decided that he wanted to floss too. So now I give him a small piece of floss and let him have at it. He doesn’t actually get the floss between any teeth. He mostly just says “mmmmmm” at the minty taste. But the proud look on his face makes my heart overflow with love. He’s flossing just like his mommy.

And then there was the other day when we got home from the grocery store. We were getting all of our shoes, coats, hats, etc. off and settling in when my son just kept opening the coat closet door. I thought he was trying to unwind the cord on the vacuum so I kept closing the door as he opened it. But he was so persistent that I finally just let him open the door. He took off his baseball cap, and reached up as high as his little arms would go, and it dawned on me…he was trying to put his baseball cap away where his Daddy’s baseball cap usually resides. I didn’t even know he had noticed where his Daddy kept his hat…let alone want to keep his there too.

I guess the point is…my son wants to be like me and like my husband. He wants to do the same things and hold the same things and see the same things. I think it is natural for a young child to want to be just like his mommy and daddy.

So it dawned on me today as I was finally sewing the binding on to a quilt that I started about four years ago. The needle worked its way in and out of the fabric, and my mind wandered as it usually does during craft projects. I wondered why we are so willing to spend so many hours on art. On creating things like quilts or paintings or sculptures. My finger was getting quite sore and I was trying to decide how much longer I wanted to spend…but I realized that I was emulating my God. The first Creator. Maybe humans love art because it brings them closer to God. Maybe it’s worth it for me to spend hours on a quilt because it gives me something in common with my creator.

It made me wonder how God views my art. I hope he views it like I do my son’s flossing. The beauty on this earth is so expansive that I could never fully comprehend it…but I try anyway to understand it…to capture it….to express it…so that I can be a little like my Creator. I hope He looks down on me and my creations, and feels and warmth in His heart, and is proud.

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A New Spin on Repentance

Posted on March 18, 2012 by kimberly

I’ve been reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning. I’m not finished with it yet, but so far it has been a great read. It’s really made me think, and I think Manning has a really excellent view on the gospel.

One part was so excellent, especially in light of lent, that I just have to share it. I’ve been reading and hearing some discussion lately about lent, and how its only purpose is to keep people in line. To keep us all feeling guilty. It’s a punishment, and it’s something that doesn’t last. Now I do agree that just giving up chocolate for a few weeks does not capture the full spirit of lent. But I’ve been so discouraged to hear this kind of talk about the season. I completely disagree. Lent is about walking the walk with Jesus. It’s about realizing why we need a savior. It’s about preparing ourselves for Easter. It’s about pushing the less important things in life aside and making room for the love and forgiveness God has for us. These things I’ve believed for years now, but Manning’s writing helps me to have an even better perspective on lent:

——

“One thing we do know: We don’t comprehend the love of Jesus Christ. Oh, we see a movie and resonate to what a young man and woman will endure for romantic love. We know that when the chips are down, if we love wildly enough we’ll fling life and caution to the winds for the one we love. But when it comes to God’s love in the broken, blood-drenched body of Jesus Christ, we get antsy and start to talk about theology, divine justice, God’s wrath, and the heresy of universalism.

The saved sinner is prostrate in adoration, lost in wonder and praise. He knows repentance is not what we do in order to earn forgiveness; it is what we do because we have been forgiven. It serves as an expression of gratitude rather than an effort to earn forgiveness. Thus the sequence of forgiveness and then repentance, rather than repentance and then forgiveness, is crucial for understanding the gospel of grace.”

——

It’s not that we don’t need to be sorry or guilty sometimes. I’m not saying lent should be all butterflies and roses. But it is humbling to remember that no form of repentance, no matter how devout or sincere could possible compare to the loving power of God. How can we be so arrogant to think that our meager works could possibly influence His love? That he would forgive us because of something we did is misguided, I think. We are forgiven first. Repentance, and thanksgiving comes later. They turn us back to God.

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What Do I Have In Common With Moses?

Posted on March 17, 2012 by kimberly

I was reading from Exodus today during my morning prayers. It is actually a continuation from yesterday’s reading where Moses encounters the burning bush, and therefore, comes face to face with God. After getting over his surprise that the bush is not being consumed, he hears God speaking to him. God has a special task for Moses. Moses’ response would be comical if it wasn’t so sad.

First, he beats around the bush a bit (pun intended). He doesn’t want to come out and say to God that he isn’t willing to go. He makes up all sorts of excuses, and he won’t stop pestering God with questions and reservations such as, “What if they don’t listen to me.” After they go back and forth for awhile, and Moses has used up every excuse he can think of, he just says, “Can’t you send someone else?”

Can’t you just imagine the big sigh that God heaved about then? “What’s it going to take to get through to this guy,” he probably thought. Poor Moses just seems so pitiful and ridiculous. Who, when lucky enough to come face to face with God, would argue? And for so long! He tried to weasel out of something that made him uncomfortable.

But then I often think that if we are comfortable, we are probably not right with God. It’s the complete opposite of the prosperity gospel, I know. But I think it’s true. Jesus challenged pretty much everything when he lived on earth. Those who were most comfortable in life were those who were most uncomfortable with the way Jesus lived and taught. Those who followed Jesus did not have the security of a home or an easy set of legalistic rules to stick to. They had to interact with undesirables like tax collectors and lepers and prostitutes. Throughout the old and new testaments we see God bringing people out of their comfort zones. Jonah was asked to help save people who were his enemies (which made him quite bitter). There are so many examples.

I do pity Moses a bit. The guy is only human after all. And I can see a bit of myself in him. It’s not like God speaks to me from a burning bush. But there have been times in my life when I’ve believed he was “speaking” to me. It’s so easy to say, “Oh, I have a child to take care of,” or “I don’t have enough money,” or, “Great! I’ll do that when I’m retired…or after I finish school….” etc. etc. etc.

When I first started feeling the call to be a Child Ambassador I resisted strongly. It makes me uncomfortable to speak to strangers (or sometimes even friends or family) about giving up their money to sponsor a child. I thought about all the anxiety I’d have about those social interactions and all the time it would take to plan events. I came up with every excuse I could. (Not so different from poor ‘ol Moses, eh?) But God was patient. I kept receiving post cards and emails. I was seeing things about Child Ambassadors everywhere! I wasn’t being let off the hook. Finally, when I was out of excuses, I said “yes,” and it was worth it.

It makes me wonder what other opportunities I am missing. Where else am I ignoring God’s call? Where else am I staying comfortable instead of being right with God?

Why after so many examples of God being right did Moses not learn from his mistake? I don’t know…all I do know is that I hope I do!

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Where’s My Motivation?

Posted on March 16, 2012 by kimberly

You know that place inside you that gives you hope and energy and the will power to get things done? I feel like mine has gone missing…or maybe just on vacation. This last week (despite all the wonderful things that have happened like having family visit) has been tough on me. I’ve just felt tired. Bone tired. I couldn’t get myself motivated to do anything during Elias’ naps. So then I started feeling lazy and unproductive, and that is never good for anyone’s mental state. Nathan said if I was that tired then I needed to rest and I should just listen to my body. He’s probably right, but I still couldn’t help but feel like I should be doing stuff. You know?

On a completely separate note…I read the Complete Tales of Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne during this same time period. So I think I’ll try to write about my experience and what I’ve learned about it from the perspective of Pooh Bear in the style of A.A. Milne. Hopefully I’ll not be breaking any copyright laws or anything. I don’t think so…It’s my writing after all…and my experience…just based on the style and characters from someone else’s imagination. If you’ve read it, I hope you see some similarities and don’t think I’m completely crazy. If you haven’t read it…well I still hope you enjoy it and don’t think I’m completely crazy. So here you go:

——————-

Pooh was sitting in his house remembering all the things he had done, and thinking that he should probably be getting out and doing something right this moment. “A pooh bear like me should be rescuing Piglet from a flood or building Eeyore a house of sticks or discovering the north pole,” thought Pooh. (Those were all things he had done recently).

Just then Pooh looked at the clock. It was eleven, and eleven was the time every day for a little something to eat. Pooh got a chair and stood on it to reach his honey pots. As he was reaching, a knock came at the door (which startled him) and he fell to the floor along with a honey pot.

“Pooh?” a voice squeaked?

“Piglet!” said Pooh as he looked down at the spilled honey. “Oh, bother.”

Pooh went to the door to let Piglet in. “What are you doing today, Pooh?”

“I’m not sure, Piglet. I was just thinking about that when the clock struck eleven and I thought I’d have a little something.” (Pooh glanced back at his honey pots. He still hadn’t gotten a little something and now it must have passed eleven). “I think today I just don’t know what to do.”

“I know!” said Piglet. “I’ll go ask Christopher Robin why you can’t figure out what to do. He’ll know!” (Really,  Piglet just wanted to see Christopher Robin. He loved when they spent time together. But he was also happy to help his friend, Pooh.)

After Piglet left, Pooh stared at the mess on the floor and thought he should probably be cleaning it up. Or maybe he should be eating it! Or maybe he could even make up a hum about it. But Pooh could not even do that. Pooh was still sitting and thinking about it when Piglet returned with Christopher Robin.

“Oh, hello Christopher Robin,” said Pooh.

“Hallo, Pooh,” he replied. “What’s the matter?”

“Pooh can’t figure out anything to do today,” said Piglet trying to be helpful. Then he peered inside and saw the honey still on the floor, “and he didn’t clean up his honey either!”

Christopher Robin poked his head in, and said, “Pooh, I think you’ve lost your motivation!”

“What’s my mustilation?” asked Pooh.

“Motivation. It’s what helps you do things.” answered Christopher Robin. “You need to find your motivation. Then you’ll have plenty to do.

Later that day, Piglet was still over, when Pooh stood up. “Piglet,” he said, “I’m going to go find my mustilation. Would you like to come with me?”

Piglet and Pooh set off to find Pooh’s mustilation. They decided to start over near Pooh Corner. Eeyore lived down there and it was swampy and damp and if something got lost there, it might not be able to find it’s way home.

“Hallo, Eeyore,” Piglet called, “We’re looking for mustilation”

“Well you don’t have to insult me,” replied Eeyore. “It’s bad enough that no one’s been down to see me for six days come Tuesday.”

Piglet did not know quite how to reply…so he said, “S-s-s-so you haven’t seen any mustilation then?”

“There you go insulting me again,” said Eeyore, and he tromped slowly away.

Pooh and Piglet looked at each other, then Piglet suggested that they try somewhere else.

Pooh and Piglet tromped all around the 100 acre forest looking for his mustilation. They visited Owl who told them all sorts of things about motivation, and none of them seemed to be helpful. Then they visited Kanga and Roo and Tigger who were all too busy with each other to be of much help. Rabbit was off looking for one of his friends-and-relations and was not any help either.

But all this time that Pooh and Piglet were searching, Pooh was thinking too. And the longer he thought, the better he felt. He felt so happy to have a friend like Piglet to come on adventures with. So he decided to go home and make Piglet a present.

As they were returning to Pooh’s house, Christopher Robin passed by. “Hallo, Pooh. Hallo, Piglet,”he said. “What are you doing?”

“We were looking for Pooh’s mustilation,” said Piglet. “I don’t know where he found it. I was with him the whole time. But he seems to have had an idea.”

“Well…” said Pooh. “Actually, Christopher Robin, I think my mustilation was with me the whole time. I didn’t have to find it. It found me!”

“Silly old bear,” said Christopher Robin, and they all went to see what kind of present Pooh was going to make.

—————–

Well anyway, I’m not sure how this story turned out. I honestly got a little tired of writing it so if the ending seems too swift…it probably is.

I guess the point is, I’ve realized that maybe both me and my husband can be right at the same time. Sometimes I do just need a little rest. A little break. But really, I don’t think I have to look for motivation. God has blessed me with certain skills and passions. All I can do is act on those to the best of my ability.

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New Eyes

Posted on March 4, 2012 by kimberly

I wonder why it takes a child’s perspective for me to really open my eyes to the world around me. So many things that I just pass by every day without noticing hold so much wonder and excitement for my son. So many things that I would take for granted, write off as ugly, or that would never even register in my brain….

It’s much more fun to live life noticing the spectacular in the mundane. It’s much more fun taking time to notice the small things. So why does it take a toddler to make me do it? What is it about this life that makes me want to rush from place to place…always “doing” something.

Thank God for the way He created our children to explore and wonder. To touch and look and listen. My son reminds me of God’s beauty every day.

Like the wilting cattails out in the wetlands. I pass them almost every day. Frankly, they are a bit ugly right now. But on one of our walks, Elias pointed them out. He was so interested in how they moved in the breeze. So I started to notice them. I saw how they hosted flocks of birds perching and singing. How they rustled in the breeze. How they looked against the blue sky. How they brought us joy on a random winter morning.

Like the twigs on trees near our home. I considered them bare, dead, not worth my attention until my son pointed them out. And when I looked, I saw buds! Spring is arriving soon. New life is found in the midst of barren trees.

Like our walk this evening when Elias was intrigued by a small gravel patch. He tentatively stepped in it, testing. He was joyfully amazed at the crunching sound it made, by the texture of the small pebbles under his feet, by the way it was different from the grass that surrounded it. Elias forced us to stop and be joyful with him as he explored. It made us stop not only to hug and marvel at our son, but at something as simple as a gravel patch. If we can find joy in such a small thing, then how much more joyful will we be at the larger things in life? If we are full of joy, there is not as much room for sorrow. It caused us to stop our “errand” of getting the mail and taking a quick walk, and just play. Nathan and Elias played chase in the grass and there was much healthy laughter.

Why does it take a child to see the world with new eyes? I don’t know. But maybe after enough times, it will become habit for me once again.

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February Readings

Posted on March 1, 2012 by kimberly

February was a pretty good reading month for me. I still find that I have way too many books I’d like to read than what I have time for. I have to prioritize by when it becomes available at the library, or who I borrowed it from. And then sometimes I read things on a whim such as the Hunger Games books this month. Here is what I read:

Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

Not the first time I’ve read this, but with the movie coming out soon, I wanted to read it again. The book is so clever in how it presents the issues of fighting/war. It is so horrible that children are thrown together in the arena and forced to fight to the death. In a way, you want them all to live. Yet I found myself still rooting for Katniss, and almost relieved when characters like Clove perished. Am I as bad as the capitol people in the book? Perhaps. I thought I was pro-life in every circumstance…and I am…but I still got caught up in the events of the story. Very thought provoking. I’ll probably write more on this later.

The Jefferson Key by Steve Berry

After reading so much nonfiction in January, I was in dire need of a quick fiction novel where I didn’t have to think much…just sit back and enjoy. I have enjoyed Steve Berry’s books in the past, and decided to check out his most recent book from the library. I wasn’t disappointed. It’s not real quality literature, but it was fast paced and kept me interested…even reading late into the night after my husband was asleep…perhaps not a wise decision these days since my toddler wakes up early no matter what. I still maintain that Berry’s first few novels are my favorite. The Amber Room and The Romanov Prophesy are definitely his best. This one was another Cotton Malone adventure, and it was just what I needed. I was surprised to find that privateers actually played a large role in helping the colonies to win the revolutionary war.

Eragon by Christopher Paolini

As I’ve said before, I like to stay up to date in the children’s literature world. This was my third read of Eragon. I enjoy fantasy novels, and while this one may be classified as “young adult,” I find that it is a very fun read. My husband got me the fourth book in the Inheritance cycle for Christmas, so I am doing a reread of the series as preparation for that fourth book!

Eldest by Christopher Paolini

Again, I am just trying to get through this series on my way to the fourth book, Inheritance. However, I am thoroughly enjoying this read through. I had forgotten a great many things in the three or so years since I last read this book. I like how the main character is not perfect. It makes the story seem more real…even though it is a fantasy novel.

The Litigators by John Grisham

I hadn’t really wanted to read this book so close to The Jefferson Key but it couldn’t be helped because of when it became available at the library. When I was in high school, John Grisham was one of my favorite authors, but I feel that I have outgrown him. At least I’ve outgrown his formulaic novels where a young southern lawyer takes on a big corporation. Recently, though, he has been branching out a bit, and I think this has been a good thing. Innocent Man and The Confession were excellent reads. This book was somewhat of a return to his old style in that it was back to young lawyers taking on big corporations. However, this book was delightful in that it was much more character driven rather than action driven. No one was running for their life. There were (almost) no thugs. Just a couple of joe-shmoe lawyers with big problems. More like real life. I think it was definitely worth the read.

Images of America: Hillsboro

One day at the library Elias picked out one of the “Images of America” books. I thought it looked interesting, and went to the catalog to see if there were any others. I found this one of Hillsboro. It was interesting to see the development of the town. Trains and rail were a lot more prominent than I had thought very early on. It also gave some fun facts of why certain areas are named what they are.

Hunger Games Official Movie Companion

My mom got this book, and loaned it to me for a couple nights to look through. It made me even more excited to see the movie. The book just talked a bit about how the movie was filmed, and how the actors where chosen. It was a “just for fun” book.

 

Periodicals

World Vision Spring – I was particularly saddened to read that U.S. mainstream media only spent 0.2 percent of its coverage for the famine in the Horn of Africa. I was encouraged to read that many of the communities which are supported by World Vision in Kenya were not affected as much as surrounding areas due to education about irrigation techniques, farming techniques, and supplies given by WV.

National Geographic Magazine October 2011 – I started reading this magazine months ago and got distracted by other books and crafts. There was a particularly interesting article about the development of the adolescent brain, and why teens act the way they do. Maybe I should file it away and get it out again in ten years or so.

Sojourners February 2012 – My brother got me a subscription to this magazine for Christmas. I found one issue in our church library last September or so and was hooked! I had only read one issue before this, so I couldn’t wait to actually have a subscription. The focus of this issue was the global slave trade, and how we can try to end it using nonviolent means. There was a particularly interesting article about the Christian churches in China, and how they are trying to help women who are sold into marriage or sexual slavery there. I think this magazine will be excellent not only in social justice issues, but also helping me to gain a more global perspective.

 

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My Poem

Posted on February 25, 2012 by kimberly

As I wrote in an earlier post, I have been taking a continuing education class in order to be able to renew my teaching license. I have been taking a course titled “Awakening the Poet Within,” which is teaching me techniques for how to use poetry to teach writing skills, and to see the importance of poetry in the lives of children.

One of the assignments was to actually craft a poem using one of the techniques that I would teach to my students. Here is what I came up with:

My Sun
My son and I
played in the fountains.
The sun made us
squint our eyes
and warmed our skin like an oven.
It brought out the color
in the flowers
and in all the swimsuits.
It made the laughter
sound more jolly,
and the splish splash of feet
sound more squishy.
It made the sky so blue
that it seemed you could dive right in
and never reach the bottom.
But it was
dull, dull, dull
compared to his smile.
Radiant beams of joy
hitting me
straight in my heart.

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Common Prayer

Posted on February 24, 2012 by kimberly

I was looking in the public library one day for books on prayer. I knew I wanted to do something related to prayer during lent. I came across Common Prayer: A Liturgy For Ordinary Radicals which is published by Zondervan. I thought it would be perfect.

The first couple days have been a bit rough for me…not because I don’t like it or because the liturgy is unsatisfactory in some way…I’m just having trouble finding the right time for the morning prayers especially. The first morning, I waited too long, and Elias woke up early. I tried to do it while he was playing, but he was too interested in what I was doing, and kept trying to take the book, so I had to wait until his nap time. Then the second morning, he had joined Nathan and I in our bed around 3 or 4 in the morning. I tried to do morning prayer while he was still sleeping…but I had to be silent since he was right next to me. I found it much harder to really focus on the prayers while being silent. My mind kept wandering. So this morning I decided to wake up earlier to do morning prayer. Well…it was still dark outside, and I basically sat up in bed and grabbed the prayer book. My gravely voice was not pretty as I tried to sing “Amazing Grace,” and my eyes weren’t really working properly so much of the text was blurry. I was almost laughing at myself the whole time. I’m sure God still appreciated the effort…but it was not a pretty sight/sound. I am now coming to terms with the fact that I will probably have to wake up even earlier, and take the time to actually wake up a bit before starting morning prayer. I’m sure it will be worth it, but I really like/need my sleep. Part of the point is that it is a sacrifice…right?

On the positive side, though, I decided to add the midday prayers to my daily regimen as well. I just looked at them on a whim yesterday, and now they are actually my favorite of the three. Morning prayers are different every day of the year, and evening prayers are different each day of the week, but midday prayers are the same every day. You can read them here if you are interested. They are so perfect for making sure my attitude is in the right place throughout the day. I think I would like to memorize them and say them every day even after Lent has passed.

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